有什么笑话合适八个人讲的啊!快点回复啊
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发布时间：2024-05-01 13:40
共3个回答
热心网友
时间：2024-11-16 12:08
1、一个女生前一天晚上得到男朋友的订婚戒指，但竟没有一个同学注意到，令她忿忿不平。到下午大家坐着谈天的时候，她突然站起来大声说：“哎呀，这里真热呀，我看我还是把戒指脱下来吧。” 2、女主人把女佣叫到面前问她：“你是否怀孕了？” “是啊！”女佣回道。 “亏你还说得出口，你还没有结婚，难道不觉得害羞吗？”女主人再次训。 “我为什么要害羞，女主人你自己不也怀孕了吗？” “可是我怀的是我丈夫的！”女主人生气地反驳。 “我也是啊！”女佣高兴地附和。 3、一个人骑摩托车喜欢反穿衣服，就是把口子在后面扣上，可以挡风。一天他酒后驾驶， 翻了，一头栽在路旁。*赶到： *甲：好严重的车祸。 *乙：是啊，脑袋都撞到后面去了。 *甲：嗯，还有呼吸，我们帮他把头转回来吧。 *乙：好.....一、二使劲，转回来了。 *甲：嗯，没有呼吸了....... 4、在一条七拐八拐的乡村公路上，因为时常发生车祸，所以常常有一些鬼故事发生，有一天晚上，有一个出租车司机看见路边有一个长发披肩，身着白衣的女人向他招手，因为这个司机没有见过鬼，所以大胆的停下来让她上车了，这一路上,司机虽然不信有鬼，心里也毛毛的，所以时常从后视镜看后面的女人，开着开着，突然司机发现那个女人不见了！司机吓了一大跳，赶紧踩了一个刹车！只见那个女人满脸是血，表情狰狞。司机吓的牙直打颤。突然那女人开口了：“你会不会开车啊！我低头系个鞋带你突然一刹车我把鼻子都撞破了……” 5、一个病人去看病，医生检查了他，皱着眉头说：“您病得太严重了，恐怕不会活多久了。” 病人：“求您告诉我我还能活多久？” 医生：“十……” 病人着急地问：“十什么？十年？？十个月？？？十天？？？？？” 医生：“十，九，八，七，六，五……” 6、老师：“你能说一些18世纪科学家共同特点吗？” 学生：“能，他们都死了。” 7、犀粪蜣和蚊子谈恋爱，蜣问蚊子是做什么工作的，蚊子说：“*，打针的。”蜣一拍大腿：“缘分呐，我是中药局搓药丸的…” 8、一非洲人住在某一宾馆。夜半，起火，不明原因。非洲人见状顾不了那么许多，光着身子就跑出去了。消防员见状惊呼：“我的妈呀！都烧的糊了吧区的了还能跑那么快！” 9、一个人想出国考察，但必须得到老总批准。于是他向老总请示，老总给了他一张字条，上面写着：“Go ahead”。 那人想：“Go ahead=前进，老总是批准了。”于是他开始打点行李。 一个同事见到了他问：“你在做什啊？？”他说：“我准备出国考察，老总批准了，给我写了‘Go ahead’。” 同事一见条就乐了：“咱们老总根本就没批准！！咱老总的英语水平你还不知道，他这是在说去个头！” 10、牧师对买了他马和马车的农夫说：“这匹马只能听懂教会的语言，叫"感谢上帝"它就跑;叫"赞美上帝"它才停下。”农夫将信将疑，他试着喊了一声感谢上帝，那匹马立刻飞奔起来，越跑越快。一只跑到悬崖边上惊恐的农夫才想起让它停下来的口令“赞美上帝”。果然，马停下来了。死里逃生的农夫长出一口气：“感谢上帝………”
我打了很久，请采纳
1 the night before, a girl get boyfriend engagement ring, but no one noticed the classmate, make her antics. You sit and chat in the afternoon, she suddenly stood up and shouted: \"oh, it's really hot in here, I think I'd better take off your ring.\" 2, the mistress called the maid to ask her: \"are you pregnant?\" \"Yes!\" The maid answered. Export \"kui you still say, you are not married, don't you feel shy?\" The hostess training again. \"Why should I be shy, you don't the hostess also pregnant?\" \"But I conceive is my husband!\" The hostess retorted angrily. \"Me too!\" The maid happy to echo. 3, a man riding a motorcycle like the dress, is to cut on the back, can the wind. Drunk driving one day, he turned over, a planted on the road. Police: police a: a good serious car accident. Policeman b: yes, his head hit the back. Po1: well, still breathing, let's help him turn his head back. Po2: good... One, two, turn back. Policeman a: well, not breathing... 4, turn in a curvy country road, because often in a car accident, so often have some ghost story, one night, there's a taxi driver saw the side of the road have a long hair shawls, dressed in a white woman waved to him, because the driver didn't see a ghost, so bold stopped to let her get on the bus, along the way, the driver doesn't believe in ghosts, the in the mind also maomao, so often the woman behind the rearview mirror to see, open open, the driver found the woman suddenly disappeared! The driver startled, hurriedly stepped on a brake! I saw the woman face is blood, grim expression. The driver frighten of teeth chatter. Suddenly the woman spoke: \"would you drive! I bow to fasten shoelaces are you smashed through a sudden brake my nose...\" 5, a patient to see a doctor, the doctor examined him, frowning said: \"you too serious ill, I'm afraid I won't live much longer.\" Patient: \"please tell me how long will I live?\" Doctor: \"ten...\" Patient anxiously asked: \"what? Ten years?? Ten months??? Ten days?????\" Doctor: \"ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five...\" 6, teacher: \"can you say some 18 th-century scientists common characteristics?\" Student: \"yes, they are all dead.\" 7, rhino poop Qiang and mosquito fall in love, Qiang asked a mosquito is to do what work, the mosquito said: \"nurse, give or take an injection.\" Qiang a clap a thigh: \"the fate, I am a traditional Chinese medicine bureau rub pills...\" 8, the africans live in a hotel. In the midnight, a fire, unknown reason. Before rushing so many africans, naked and ran out. Firefighters said exclaimed: \"my mama ah! All paste the burned area can run so fast!\" 9, a person wants to go abroad, but it must be approved by boss. So he to the manager for instructions, the boss gave him a note, it read: \"Go ahead\". The man thought, \"Go ahead = progress, boss is approved.\" So he started to packing. A colleague to see he asked: \"what are you doing?\" He said: \"I'm ready to Go abroad investigation, boss approved, wrote me 'Go ahead'.\" Colleague of joy at the sight of article: \"let's boss haven't approved!!!!! Our boss English don't you know, he is said to head!\" 10, priests to buy his horse and carriage of the farmer said, \"this horse can only understand the language of the church, call\" thank god \"it ran; called\" praise god \"it didn't stop.\" Farmer track, he tried to thank god gave a cry, the horse gallop, immediately ran faster and faster. A run to the edge of the cliff frightened farmer remembered that let it stop password \"praise god\". Sure enough, the horse stopped. Close the farmer grows a sigh: \"thank god.........\"
I played for a long time, please
热心网友
时间：2024-11-16 12:08
看到体重计上的数字：我要减肥。买衣服的时候：我要减肥。碰到身材好的人：我要减肥。看见镜子里的自己：我要减肥。遇到喜欢的人：我要减肥。看见吃的：去*减肥 ！！
圣诞节要到啦，一起唱歌吧，预备——起，大河向东流啊，天下的情侣都分手啊，（诶嘿诶嘿都分手啊，过完圣诞就分手啊），路见不平一声吼啊，不分手就泼汽油啊，点火烧死没人救啊，嗨呀，咦二呀，秀恩爱的情侣呀，你说这的多大仇啊，不分手就泼汽油啊，点火烧死没有救啊！（嘿嘿嗨哟嘿嘿）
话说…………你要说Good job的话想省点功夫就写GJ怕人家看不懂就完完整整写Good job得了………………你写成Good jb是几个意思几个意思？？！！！！！
小时候我妈把我交给姐姐带，姐姐要和同学打乒乓球不想带我玩，她把我拉到一边，从煤堆里捡了几粒煤块，语重心长地说，你把这些洗干净就可以来和我们玩了……然后我很认真的洗了一个下午的煤球…、
跟我嗨起来！雷地森，奸特们，老少爷们娘们们，请举起你们的双手，让我看到你们的双手好么？动词大慈，动词大慈，AV8D，上面的朋友和我一起，万，吐，碎、佛，抗忙昂北鼻够！夏天夏天悄悄过去，开着拖拉机，压死你，压死你，不让你喘气～～歌曲完毕，掌声随意！
圣诞节快到了，小白兔生气地对小鹿说：“你看人家别的女孩子都能收到花，你为什么不送给我。”小鹿可怜巴巴的说：“因为我是梅花鹿啊。”
一朋友，卖水果的，他说卖了十几年了都没挣到什么钱，但是一直不愿转行，原因是：我的水果摊位桌子都很低，每天大量美女低头挑水果是我坚持下去的动力！
动物园学校的大象老师病了，班上最调皮的小猴同学去看望她，“大象老师，一定是我不听话，把您气病了。我以后一定好好学习，再也不惹您生气了！”“真乖，”老师用虚弱的鼻子*着小猴头，“你打算学什么呀？”“老师，我想学气象学，以后到气象站，去做气象员！”
我觉得一个好的周末应该是这样的：睡到中午醒来,在床上躺着玩两个小时手机,起床随便吃点东西,下午去超市买一大堆零食,五六点的时候去约小伙伴们吃火锅烧烤,如果是一个人的话就去吃炸鸡,看电影。晚上没有其他活动的话就回到住处,趴在电脑前喝点小酒,刷微博看剧吃零食,想熬到几点熬到几点
有一种人，到哪里都带着手机 吃饭的时候，手机放桌子上； 睡觉的时候，手机放枕头边； 拖地的时候，手机放口袋里； 洗澡的时候，手机放浴池边； 游戏的时候，手机放电脑边； 手机从来不响，短信也从来没有，但仍乐此不疲，而我正是这种人！
热心网友
时间：2024-11-16 12:09
