50分求雅思作文评分
发布网友
发布时间：2022-05-15 07:19
共2个回答
热心网友
时间：2023-10-13 09:13
it will extremely valuable for our mankind. 改 it will be extremely...
One of the clear advantage is that human obtain a great opportunity to search more useful resources such as new fuel materials, new species and so on. Nowadays, people are obliged to face the plight of the crisises of energy shortage and air pollution brought by car exhaust. Nevertheless, there is lots of clear energy which has been testified by scientists on the moon （月球上的科学家？）. Therefore, obviously, the travel to moon is undoubtedly beneficial for human’s future life.
改
One of the clear advantages is that human would obtain a great opportunity to search more useful resources such as new fuel materials, new species and so on. Nowadays, people are obliged to face the plight of the crisises of energy shortage and air pollution brought by car exhaust. Nevertheless, there is lots of clear energy on the moon which has been testified by scientists. Therefore, travel to the moon is undoubtedly beneficial to human’s future life.
owever, some people are not in favor of such travel, worrying too much money spent in exploring the moon, it may contribute to no enough budget for citizens’ welfare, such as healthcare and ecation.
改：
owever, some people are not in favor of such travel, worrying too much about the money spent in exploring the moon, which may contribute to citizens’ welfare, such as healthcare and ecation.
总的说来5.5-6分，语法错误有一些，句子还可以更精炼一点。各段内部最好能分一分层次。
建议多练习句型，高级词汇不是短时间能掌握的（速背下来用的不恰当不如不用）
祝你成功
热心网友
时间：2023-10-13 09:13
病句：it will extremely valuable for our mankind， we will no longer be worried about ，However, some people are not in favor of such travel, worrying too much money spent in exploring the moon, it may contribute to no enough budget for citizens’ welfare, such as healthcare and ecation，
整体感觉还行，有些词语较为低级如say。尽量少用，多用高级词汇
注意复杂从句语法
最后祝你成功！！
